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HOW TO HAVE ANAL SEX AND ENJOY IT

1. Be sure you really want it. It's important to decide jointly that this is something that you wish to explore with your partner.

2. Relax. The second thing that I tell clients who ask for technique tips is to breathe into the experience. The anal sphincter muscles are tight bands that encircle the anal opening and control your bowel functions. If you try to penetrate them without breathing deeply, it will most likely cause you pain. In fact, I always suggest that couples insert a well lubed fingertip first, allowing the sphincter muscles to gradually dilate to the size of the penetrating object until you are both ready for the entry of a live penis. Remember, the object is not to stretch the anal opening, but allow it to expand slowly, accommodating whatever is being inserted into it.

3. Lube! Lube! Lube! The third key to pleasurable anal sex is using plenty of personal lubricants. If you are using latex condoms then you need to use a water-based lubricant such as Astroglide or Kama Sutra products.

4. Don't hurry or force it. The worst action that you can take is to force entry into the rectum, which is the opening to the anal canal. Sometimes the sheer act of hurrying entry or thrusting too soon is enough to sour one's taste for anal pleasures for good. If you take your time and go slowly during penetration (after applying generous amounts of personal lube), the experience will be much more pleasurable.

5. Don't forget about STDs. One of the most common mistakes couples can make in exploring anal sex is forgetting disease prevention. Anal sex can be a great method for sharing skin and making intimate contact without worrying about pregnancy, but being careless about disease transmission is never an acceptable alternative to healthy sexual expression. Just as with standard penis-in-vagina intercourse, you always need to use protection, such as a latex or polyurethane condom with either nonoxynol-9 in it to kill sperm and bacteria. Or if you prefer, use a nonlubricated condom without the spermicidal ingredient. (Whichever you choose, it's important to apply lubricant over the condom before you insert it.) After orgasm and ejaculation occurs, be sure to hold the base of the condom to prevent slippage or spillage.